Introducing Tea

Just knowing you’ve got space, and it’s warm, means so much. It heals you. I know what it’s like to be outside for 12 hours when it’s cold and wet. Boots soak right through.

But thanks to Outside In and thanks to people like you, I know I’m going to a safe place today. I can relax a bit. I can actually relax and be me.

I feel comfortable using the resources at Outside In now—education support, the medical clinic, hot meals. But when we first find our way here, a lot of us who’ve been homeless have a “dead scared” expression on our faces.

After only a short time, I’ve experienced something that used to take at least a month. I’m making friends. We’re seeing eye-to-eye. We laugh, we play games, we joke with each other. When I moved into the Transitional Living Program, everybody clapped. They were hollering and hooting and cheering me. I felt so welcome. I cried.

It feels comforting, like home.

I love people. As a kid, in New Hampshire, I was too ecstatic, too energetic for my peers. I was in a rough neighborhood. Even in fifth grade, most of my classmates were in gangs. COVID-19 happened when I was in high school. I was studying so hard, but it was so isolating. Wherever I moved, people started bullying me. I tried to make friends, but nothing worked.

Finding Support

All along, I’ve had a rough time with my mental health. Being on the streets makes that so much harder. At times I wondered: Am I dying? About a year ago, I was diagnosed with non-epileptic seizures. The seizures hurt when I have them—and the stress. How do I explain them?

Before I came here, I’d moved to Hollywood. It was not all sparkles. It felt like dry, hot sand. I was not coping well. But I knew I needed health and support. I made my way up to Portland.

At Outside In, the staff told me about the Employment and Education Resource Center. “I need that!” I said.

Now, in addition to taking classes, I’m tending to my health, getting recovery support, and enjoying three healthy meals a day. The routine is so important.

I’m 23. I started transitioning three years ago. The interactions I have now are authentic. I’m so happy to be seen and heard, and I understand I can finally be safe around people. I love my video games—not gonna lie—but I also love neighbors and connections in real life. It makes me feel so good, seeing people in the world.

Now I’m a full-time student. With continued support from Outside In, in no time I’ll be entering my second term at Clackamas Community College. My plan is to get an associate’s degree and transfer to Portland State University to become a psychology major with a minor in social work.

I’m most excited about my harm reduction class, where I go to recovery programs and observe and take notes. I’m still learning skills about processing my own emotions. But I know I would love to use my own experiences to do peer support, and then advocacy work.

Looking Closely

I’ve also been able to engage in a little passion project of mine. I love to take photos of things I see, because my eyes don’t work so well. At a certain point, everything goes flat. But when I’m taking pictures with the camera, I know there’s depth. And I have this feeling of seeing something other people would pass over. I love macro—seeing a little plant or something that becomes big in the photo. It’s wonderful. I just love the feeling of people noticing something they would otherwise walk past. That’s something I’ve experienced myself. But I don’t feel like that anymore, I don’t feel passed over.

I feel like I matter, and that feeling really started coming out when I got here.

I’m just one of so many people helped by Outside In throughout the year.

I hope the little bit I’ve shared about myself inspires you to support Outside In and the difference it can make for all kinds of people—including people like me. Please give today.

Warmly,

Tea
he/him
Outside In Participant

Giving Thanks

Because of the kindness of people like you supporting Outside In, I feel safe, I feel stable, and I feel home. I know times are tough. If you are in a position to give, thank you!